Apr
5
The well meaning musings of a group of deluded reprobates
Apr
5
Apparently, Erykah Badu “picks her friends like she picks her fruit”. Does this mean she turns them upside down and sniffs their rear ends? Or does she just prod them a bit, then tut and put them in a massive woven basket anyway?
Suppose it depends on here style of fruit picking. On the one hand she may spend a good minute turning them over in her hands looking for minor imperfections, rejecting them for factors such as incorrect curvature and discolouration. However, if she’s like me she probably inadvertently buys a squishy one having grabbed it up while talking on her phone at the same time, puts it in the back of the fridge to go mouldy and then chucks it out about two weeks later when it’s turned to vodka. Bitch